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Value vs Relationships, what's more important?

What is more important, the value or the trusting relationship?


That’s a critical question because it’ll define your success.


I recently received this message from someone I don’t know:


“Saw you’re in ecommerce and I’d like to invite you a GA4 bootcamp that shows how to use it for customer shopping analytics. People love it. Game?”


It’s a compelling value message, but I felt it was sent to random people.


It also asked me to make up my mind on the spot.


So I thought, “Not me. Not now. No, thanks.” Delete.


I quit reacting to random messages sent to random people. I don't see it being productive.


First, I build trusting relationships.


Here’s my code of engaging in business:

  • Connect
  • Build trust
  • Discover interests
  • Offer value
  • Consider options
  • Make a deal


Many people put value on top because it makes money.


But a trusting relationship is the vehicle of the business.


I’ll give you another example.


My friends had to choose a realtor.


First of all, they looked among people they already knew.


It didn’t matter if it was someone they knew through a hiking club or a yoga class.


They found two and then talked to one of them about fees and expressed interest in working together.


Later, they talked to the other one and negotiated lesser fees!


Did they switch over?


No.


Because they didn’t want to break the relationship with the first one.


They didn’t even ask for a discount, though the difference amounted to a few thousand dollars.


Let me summarize:


  • Distrust is costly and causes business issues, even when the value is excellent. Blunt pitch rarely works.
  • Trusting relationships cost money. How much? It could be a small fortune.
  • Most importantly, without relationships, you may lose business when the economic situation changes. The relationship is your insurance.


How could you quickly build trust with someone you don’t know?


Here are high-level principles that deserve in-depth discussion:


  • Be patient. Don’t press for decisions before you discover interests. It will trigger defensiveness.
  • Get to know each other without expectations. Focus on what you like. It’ll help build trust.
  • Explore in-depth to find personal values and principles. It will help build rapport.
  • Notice emotions and surface them. Recognizing emotions helps you connect.
  • Build comfort by nurturing, clarifying your intent, and recognizing the right to say NO.
  • Neutralize residual negative perceptions by surfacing them. Undisclosed negativity is risky.


You may use these principles to prepare for a significant deal or a high-value transaction.


For example, if you’re a RE Agent talking to a buyer who is shopping for the first house or a Financial Advisor looking for a new long-term client who is unsure about their own performance.


Or maybe you’re an employee and want to ask for a raise?


Check out the masterclass “7 Levels of Nurturing™ for Building Trusting Business Relationships” to see how the principles work together.


- Vlad, your Business Relationships Coach




Join the "Easy Start" call to ask any questions about building trust.

https://bit.ly/easy-start-30-min


Or if you're a master of negotiation - take a quiz and see where you stand.

https://bit.ly/negotiation-quiz-1


Want to check your influence skills? Here's the survey:

https://bit.ly/ethical-influence-survey-for-advisors